Well, today's the 6th of the month. Ahhhhh. Happy 23th mth
Hais. Don't ask me what i want. I just want to continued to be like that.
The r/s is hanging half way. I feels stress when it come to r/s problem.
I don't know why. Sigh. I really don't want to be in r/s now.
So what you are with the person you love? To me, nothing will last.
Too little confidence for me to last till until i'm an adult. Really.
Sometime i feel so tired. I don't know what to do.
I just think it's too early for me to be in a r/s now. I'm not into this anymore.
Sorry to say i've changed, i mean my thinking.
Not i force myself to change, maybe is the age that makes me change?
Hais. I don't even know what i really want now.
Is all in a messy. Haiss. I'm too tired, too lazy to care about those things.
My energy get used up very fast. I don't know why. Mood swing esp.
Getting bad to worst lah. Ahhhhhhh. I don't want.
I really want to keep myself busy ¬ think of those stuffs.
I really don't feel like thinking. I know it's tiring for you to wait for me.
&&i really can't bear to let you. If i really let go, will we still be friends?
Can we still go out together? I doubt so. That's why i don't want to give up.
You even say that don't make you happy for nothing.
Then i shall tell you, how many times you make me happy for nothing??
You never know. All your promises &everything which make me happy for nothing.
Sorry if i make you feel that. Haisss. I really don't know what to do.
If i really let go &when i get myself sorted out with everything, i guess you're gone.
&i know i can't blame you. At first was me who let you go.
Please please please, don't get so affect by all this you're going thru.
Afterall, studies shld be your first priority. If r/s is your first priority then i'm wordless.
All i can say is SORRY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, HOW TO MAKE DECISION.


I really wish to sleep forever, so i'm won't need to get stress up by all this.
Crying &the pain in my heart. haisss. Let me sleep forever. Sighhh.
Let me get brainwash, to forget everything &start anew.
I know i have to accept all this consequence since i have started this r/s.
No r/s is perfect. On the outer shell, it may be always sweet &loving.
But inside, it's never sweet at all. For minority maybe, but not for majority.
Sighhhhhh. Now i wish &waiting for is my Nlevel result. Ahhhhhh.
Next, i just to concentrate on my paper2 &my work.
I don't care how others look at me, think of me. As long as i know myself i'm pretty fine.
I'm still able to cope with my life. &I still have a grps of friends who's cheering me up.
&my fav girls are there for me. ((((: &he's still there beside me.